Well, I got that previous post done just in time for me to make it to my Progressive Medical doctor appointment. While I was in there, I guess the nurse talked to other docs and when I got back to the IV room she told me I really should try to get to the surgeon's office today so that they can check out the port. This got me very scared that something more serious might be wrong. I kept asking them what they thought was the problem, and they just kind of brushed it off. But still, I should go. Even Andre, the tech that always makes fun of me when I cry came up to me and actually comforted me. And also agreed that I go to the doctor just to make sure it wasn't anything serious.
So I call the surgeon and leave a voice mail. While waiting I get in the hyperbaric chamber and just let my mind run away with me. What if it is a blood clot, and it breaks loose and I have a stroke? What if the port broke and I have to get surgery again? Not to mention the fact that my chest was feeling bruised and swollen from all the sticks that morning. I wasn't looking forward to anyone going in again and checking it out. I cried and cried. And this was supposed to be one of the precious good days I have. Dammit. One more good day given up to this illness.
The surgeon's office calls and says he can see me if I can hurry and get there. So I hurried. And I got there. My mom wanted to be there with me. As soon as she heard, she dropped what she was doing and drove down there to meet me and give her motherly support. I was much closer though. And was seen right away. The surgeon poked and prodded, and sure enough...he GOT IT!! YES! I can't tell you the relief I felt at that moment. I cried tears of relief. The stress level had been rising and I was trying so hard to hold it together. But when I saw that beautiful red blood...wow, I haven't felt that relieved in a long time. You wouldn't tell by the tears, but you know...
Mom met me as I was leaving Kaiser. We stood there and hugged in the sunlight. A long, loving hug where she just let me sob on her shoulder and get it out. I felt totally fried. Totally fried.
She'd driven all this way. And suggested maybe some therapeutic shopping to get our minds off this. The mall was just down the street after all. I typically go home and work on the good days. But I was so drained. SO, I spent the rest of the afternoon with my mom shopping. It was so nice. She bought be two cute hats. And I found the sale rack at INC and found some cute tops! I am not much of a shopper at all, but somehow today, it was just what the doctor ordered.
So here I sit. Headache, eyes puffy. But I am home, and I have the needle in my port. And I don't have to have surgery tomorrow. My mom showed her mother love again.
I have this image of a video game character in which I have a battle axe in my hand and I just keep slaying beasts as they approach me. One gone, then another. I am just hacking my way through this adventure. I wonder what the next beast will be?
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My Lovly Eve
ReplyDeleteThe love you have inside you will win!!
No, I haven't personally gone thru what you are experiencing, on the other side, with you always with you. Remember please I am their. You're sweet sweet mother. Bless her. Running to be by her baby girls side to give you her strength which she has and you need to use. Good on both. I wish I were with you to also give strength able to give you the hugs. My heart hurts for this pain you must go thru. If only I could take it for you. Dad and I are so confused why could they not take care of the clot and not stress you about it? Did they really have to scare the life from you just one more time.
Well, glad to know that you were successfull in all of your days events to not only handle but completion of your mission. Yes, I am sure that when you saw the beautiful red blood you were able to breath and know you are now safe. Any idea as to why the clot? Do you need to be on a thinner to prevent this? Why could they not take action instead of you having to go to your surgeon?
I was at work and Chuck called asked if I had seen your latest post and for some odd reason I couldn't access it from my work site.
I called Tara and she read to me. I am now at home on my computer.
Were you able to call Michael and let him know what was happening? Hope so. I feel your mom was beside her self until she could get her hands on you. I would have been, as well know you are getting HUGSS as you read this great big hugs!!
Call me in the a.m. I go to work in the afernoon, share with me in the morning while you are getting your oj. Love to hear from you. Blessed be momma2
Eve! Pelosi and Reid read your post and now they are planning to put funding of an afternoon of shopping therapy into Obamacare. Well, I wish I were there to hug you too. See you in December, I hope.
ReplyDeleteRin, you and Chuck are just such sweet people. I am so lucky to be able to call you parents too! I enjoyed our chat yesterday. Much love you to both!
ReplyDeleteAnd Jim, you still have us laughing at the Pelosi/Reid comment. Great idea!! I can't wait to see you in December!! Love, Eve
LOVE you sis! Just remember to include the weapon wielding family and friends in your video game vision. We lift you just high enough to decapitate the enemy :D
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